A key factor in any person's success with a mental illness such as Bipolar, Depression, Schizophrenia, ADHD, PTSD, etc. is to walk beside them all the way. So, according to the International Foundation on Education on Depression, here are some tips to help your loved one get through this Holy-Day season so that it is enjoyable for everyone.
(1) PARTNER WITH YOUR LOVED ONE!
IFRED suggests you exercise patience with your loved one. I know that can be easier said than done, however, it is true. Patience is very important because serenity works. When you lose patience and accuse, etc. you immediately put the loved one on the defensive and both of you will have a rotten day. There will be threats and arguements and so much unnecessary stress.
Understand that the loved one cannot just get themselves togther in a flash and act right like you expect. Plan ahead to avoid the need to fuss and carry on because the loved one is not responding to you quick enough.
(2) Compassion!
Remember that medications can take up to four to six weeks to kick in. If it is within this time frame of your loved one beginning medications, don't expect miracles and become irate when they do not occur.
(3) Track their medications!
Be a partner with your loved one and keep track of their medications for them and with them. Make note of their mood changes as well. Believe it or not, keeping track of medications before you stabiize is burdensome and frought with mistakes. An individual may believe they have taken medications when they have not. An individual can forget they took the medication and take it twice. Be supportive by keeping track of the medications at least until they completely stabilize.
(4) Guard them tenderly!
Watch over your loved ones and help them when they struggle especially in the presence of company. Help them preserve their dignity and avoid stigmas associated with shame and embarrassment by scolding them in front of guests. Remember disrespect is generatonal so when you do this in front of chidren, they grow up disrespecting individuals with a mental illness, too. It also allows children to develop shame and embarassment and denial should they develop a mental illness. All of this creates stigmas! The cycle must stop and you have the power to change and break the cycle.
Also, gently help loved ones with a mental illness/depression to a quiet space for a few minutes for a break from stimulants and keep in mind that the energy level is very, very low when you suffer with chronic depression. It is also a time when suicidal thoughts are active so keep an extra eye on their behaviors, moods, actions! Always know where the medications are and the quantity!
(5) Educate yourself about depression!
The more you know, the more you can be a help to your loved one. Stay on top of the latest treatments and medications. Attend counseling or therapies with your loved one as much as possible. TELL them you care and do not take for granted they know already. Depression causes you to feel allll alone!
(6) Share your honest feelings!
Do not lie to a loved one. Be honest about how you feel or how the family feels. Do it in a constructive, positive way and not to blame or put-down your loved one. Remember, depression is random and uncontrollable. It is TREATABLE, however!
(7) Develop a Crisis Plan with your loved one!
Discuss with your loved one and his/her healthcare provider a plan in the event of a crisis. Know who to contact and when and then stick to it at all costs!!!
(8) Be a key person in their support system.
Trust is everything and so is dependablility. Make the time to be there to listen or help a loved one with medications or rides to the doctor or a listening ear with constructive feedback. Do not humiliate your loved one or strip their dignity! Remember the low, low energy, too. This means that you may need to help out with housechores and personal grooming until the loved one stabilizes with medication. We're talking love here, Santa! Smile.
Be sure to do at least one "A" activity with your loved one and family and take take time out to rest and enjoy YOUR day, too! Thank you, Santa for caring...and Merry Christmas!!!:)
Agnes B. Levine
Author of: "Cooling Well Water: A Collection of Work By An African-American Bipolar Woman" ISBN 0975461206 Winter 2009 Release Pending
www.myspace.com/coolingwellwater (Subscribe Now)
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Posted By: agnes levine
Saturday, December 20th 2008 at 10:11PM
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